It is not uncommon to hear from one of my clients that their relationship with their spouse or child or parent is in trouble. They may say they do not feel as close as they once did. They may say they no longer talk very much, and that they don’t know how to get the closeness back. In my … [Read more...] about Clarify your intentions: Say what you mean
Talk to your aging parents about necessary changes
Talking to your aging parent about the physical and mental losses they are experiencing as they age can be difficult, especially when major decisions and life changes need to be made. … [Read more...] about Talk to your aging parents about necessary changes
Switching roles: When elderly parents become dependent
Talking to your aging parents about the physical and mental losses they are experiencing is not easy. This is often because your parents are used to being "the parent" in the relationship, and you are used to being the child. … [Read more...] about Switching roles: When elderly parents become dependent
Ending a toxic relationship with a parent
Are you estranged from a parent? Have you chosen to cut-off contact because of on-going abuse? It is neither unthinkable nor unacceptable for someone to choose to end a relationship because their parent is abusive. … [Read more...] about Ending a toxic relationship with a parent
Toxic family relationships: When to quit
Toxic relationships with family members are unhealthy, and can be so emotionally damaging that the person being harmed may need to end the relationship. … [Read more...] about Toxic family relationships: When to quit
Prepare for an assessment of dementia
I sometimes work with people that have a family member with dementia. This is a stressful period for most people, both from an emotional perspective, and because it is difficult to learn where to find appropriate resources. Obtaining a formal diagnosis of dementia for your family member is an … [Read more...] about Prepare for an assessment of dementia
Recognize the signs of mild to moderate dementia
I recently helped a good friend transition her mother, who has mild to moderate dementia, into an assisted living program. As one of the first steps, I wrote a letter to the mother’s primary care physician, documenting the signs of dementia that I observed when I spent a week with her at her cottage … [Read more...] about Recognize the signs of mild to moderate dementia
Proceed cautiously: Trauma re-enactments in adult relationships
Adult survivors of childhood abuse often experience problems related to their early abuse in their relationships as adults. This may be because humans become hard-wired during early life to recognize future relationships that resemble the relationships they had with their parents through a … [Read more...] about Proceed cautiously: Trauma re-enactments in adult relationships
Must I provide care to my unhealthy or aging parent?
The quick answer to that question is "No, you do not have to provide care to an unhealthy or aging parent as an adult, especially when that parent abused you as a child." All parents commit to "the most basic contract” when they conceive and decide to keep and raise a child, which is, as Dr. Laura … [Read more...] about Must I provide care to my unhealthy or aging parent?
Why you stay in a bad relationship
Sometimes a client will tell me that their spouse doesn’t treat them very well, and will ponder aloud why they remain in the relationship. … [Read more...] about Why you stay in a bad relationship