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Are you in Burnout? 10 Important Questions and Answers


In my private practice as a psychologist, I have worked with as many male survivors of domestic violence as female survivors. I find it baffling, based on this experience, that the fact that men are sometimes battered by women is not in the media at all. When I talk about males survivors of domestic violence, […] Continue Reading

I often discuss the roles that people can assume in relationships with my clients. As we talk about a relationship, we will sometimes do an exercise that can help them to develop new insights. Today, my plan is to share that exercise with you.  As I talk about a relationship with a client, I write the […] Continue Reading

I have heard a lot about adult birthday celebrations. Sometimes there are surprise parties. Sometimes there are gifts. Cake often figures into it. Today, I would like to write about how some people get celebrating someone else’s birthday absolutely right. And how some people get it wrong. Lots of my clients tell me they enjoyed their […] Continue Reading

A woman I knew once told me that she couldn’t imagine being single. Her name was Mary Ellen. She was married to a great guy named Stephen who loved her and treated her well. They both had successful careers and had just bought a house together.   (All identifying information has been changed to protect […] Continue Reading

I have had several clients tell me that they do not enjoy Christmas. Sure, they like having the holiday time off from work or school and the fact that everything comes to a halt for several days. But they don’t enjoy Christmas, or the days leading up to Christmas. Why is that?  For many, they […] Continue Reading

It is not uncommon to hear from one of my clients that their relationship with their spouse or child or parent is in trouble. They may say they do not feel as close as they once did. They may say they no longer talk very much, and that they don’t know how to get the closeness […] Continue Reading

Talking to your aging parent about the physical and mental losses they are experiencing as they age can be difficult, especially when major decisions and life changes need to be made. You might feel you need to start a conversation with your aging parents about when it is time for them to sell the house […] Continue Reading

Talking to your aging parents about the physical and mental losses they are experiencing is not easy. This is often because your parents are used to being "the parent" in the relationship, and you are used to being the child. As parents live into their advanced years, however, they are more likely to become dependent […] Continue Reading

Research professor Brene´ Brown has spent the past ten years studying vulnerability, courage, authenticity and shame. This 2010 TED talk on the power of vulnerability is one of the most watched talks on TED.com. Brown’s research focuses on how we need to embrace vulnerability for connection with others to take place […] Continue Reading

The experience of having a pet die can be difficult. When the death is anticipated, it is typically accompanied by grief during the lead up to the death. When the death it is sudden, the shock can feel overwhelming. Both anticipated and sudden deaths involve grief, which is most intense initially, and can last for several weeks […] Continue Reading

Are you estranged from a parent? Have you chosen to cut-off contact because of on-going abuse? It is neither unthinkable nor unacceptable for someone to choose to end a relationship because their parent is abusive. Adult children in these cases have determined that a cut-off is necessary to protect their own mental health. These adult […] Continue Reading

Toxic relationships with family members are unhealthy, and can be so emotionally damaging that the person being harmed may need to end the relationship. I have counselled adults that would benefit from completely cutting off contact with family members because those family members continue to abuse them. Although making the decision to end a relationship […] Continue Reading

I sometimes suggest men watch Jason Headley's popular video called "It's not about the nail" when they feel pressured to solve their wives problems. Similarly, I sometimes suggest women watch the video to help them become more open to accepting help from their husbands […] Continue Reading

Sometimes a client will tell me that their spouse doesn’t treat them very well, and will ponder aloud why they remain in the relationship. An “Ambivalent Relationship” is one in which one spouse is warm and caring only some of the time. Once they believe their partner feels valued and is emotionally committed to the […] Continue Reading

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Are you in Burnout? 10 Important Questions and Answers